My Wife Cares Not for My Feelings

Lo, on this day of Valentine When throngs of lovers overspend on plant-based products from Colombia Which sadly are not coffee and thus have no real value to humans I pay homage to my Spouse But not in the way in which she would prefer Because she cares not for my feelings For if she […]

An open letter to my seamstress

Dear Chumkee, We don’t know each other, but we have a lot in common. I just bought a new shirt at Stein Mart. Because you sew a ton of shirts every day, there’s a chance you made mine. Small world, huh? All my apparel originates from exotic locales. When I visited a small South American city […]

My wife is a lazy liar

It’s the last day of school for my lazy, lying wife. She says teachers still have to go to work, but that can’t be right. Teachers only work when the kids are at school. I wish she would come clean and admit she is not really a teacher.  School starts around 9:00 and dismisses at 3:45. […]