Lo, on this day of Valentine
When throngs of lovers overspend on plant-based products from Colombia
Which sadly are not coffee and thus have no real value to humans
I pay homage to my Spouse
But not in the way in which she would prefer
Because she cares not for my feelings
For if she did care one whit for me
She would seek now The Change.
And leave behind public school Teachery.
Oh, the embarrassment of admitting to the world!
That my wife sucks at the government teat in the pretense of educating children
Behold the farce!
What a joke played on the Innocent!
Mend your ways, Selfish Spouse
Give up your large salary and cozy work environment
Say no more to incompetence.
Go teach where real learning occurs
Get thee to a Charter School.
Heed not those who use statistics to show Charters receive less funding
Beware research showing Charter students do no better in The World
Believe the hype
Trust politicians who want to spend less
For their motives are not of the Ulterior Kind
They know more about education than you do
With haste, turn your back on poor teachering
Unite with those who promise excellent learning through Chartering
Transform America’s uneducated masses into learned waifs.
It is your Duty, Dear Spouse
Think of yourself no longer
Think of me and the poor children
You have been doing it wrong
You are a Failure
Charter School Teachering will transform you
And when your students bestow on you
Chocolate of various kinds on this Day of Tine’s Val
Save the candy for me.